Author : William Stewart
reprinted from “…And They Shall Become One Flesh” available on Amazon.com in Kindle format.
…that the older men be sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith, in love, in patience; the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things… (Titus 2:2-3)
Qualifying As An Elder / Deacon
The qualifications for a man to serve as either an elder or deacon in the Lord’s church have nothing to do with education, social status, or popularity, but deal with character, experience and faithfulness. God desires individuals who have been molded by His word to exercise the leadership in the church. It should be the desire of every man to develop the character which God demands in elders and deacons, whether he will ever serve in that capacity or not. Though these characteristics are specifically mentioned with regard to the leadership of the church, they are attributes which are necessary in all Christians.
Consider the qualifications of these men (1 Timothy 3:1-13; Titus 1:5-9):
- Blameless. Not that he has never sinned or made errors in judgment, but he displays an upright, honourable and honest character. His life is exemplary.
- Husband of one wife. He is not unmarried, nor is he a polygamist. By implication, he is what God would have him to be as a husband, thus enabling him to be an example for others.
- Temperate. He is alert of the power of sin, and ready to overcome, and help others to do so also.
- Sober-minded. He is not swayed by emotional impulses, but is able to think clearly and make appropriate application of God’s will to situations.
- Of good behavior. This speaks both to his physical appearance and how he carries himself. He is not disorderly, but always of good conduct.
- Hospitable. He makes others feel welcome, whether friends or strangers. He is generous and ready to serve others.
- Able to teach. He is knowledgeable with regard to God’s word, and possesses the ability to convey it to others in an understandable fashion.
- Not given to wine. He does not long for intoxicating drink or the effect which it has on the body. He does not allow his faculties to be compromised.
- Not violent. Though circumstances may anger him, he does not allow rage to control him. He can be angry and not sin (Ephesians 4:26).
- Not greedy for money. His earnings are received through moral and legal labour. He understands that spiritual matters are of greater importance than monetary.
- Gentle. He has learned the compassion of Christ, which extols righteousness, rebukes sin, but encourages sinners. He does not seek to offend, but displays a spirit of patience and helpfulness.
- Not quarrelsome. He is able to interact with folks without being contentious. He does not need to have his way; but will “contend earnestly for the faith” (Jude 1:3).
- Not covetous. He realizes the temporal nature of earthly possessions.
- One who rules his own house well. He is respected in his own household, and acknowledged by his wife and children as the God-appointed leader of the home. In that position, he serves his wife and children well, providing an environment which maximizes the spiritual growth of all. His children are identified as “faithful” or “believing.”
- Not a novice. He has been a Christian for some time, having grown to a place of spiritual maturity. Among the traits which he has learned in maturing in Christ is to not be given to pride.
- A good testimony among those who are outside. His reputation is not just good among those who are Christians, but non-Christians also are aware that he is a godly man. He has not hidden his commitment to the Lord, but shines as a light before men (Matthew 5:16).
- Not self-willed. He is not inclined to put himself before others (Philippians 2:3-5)
- Not quick-tempered. Not easily provoked, “slow to anger” (James 1:19). When he is angered, he does not allow it to become sin (Ephesians 4:26)
- A lover of what is good. He delights in the things of God. He finds no pleasure in the things off the devil.
- Just. He does not show prejudice or partiality. He makes decisions and judgments based upon the precepts of God’s word.
- Holy. He is an imitator of the Lord (1 Peter 1:13-16). He has determined to set apart his life for God.
- Self-controlled. He does not lose his head, his tongue, his temper; he is able to hold passions in check.
- Holding fast the faithful word. God’s word is of paramount importance to him. He acknowledges it as the source of life eternal, and clings to its every statute.
- Reverent. He has a serious and respectful attitude towards the Lord and the things of God.
- Not double-tongued. He does not deal in deception or hypocrisy. He says what he means.
- Holding the mystery of faith in a pure conscience. he clings to the message of Christ, and is obedient (thus the pure conscience).
The Wife Of A Leader
In the midst of giving qualifications for men to serve as elders and deacons in the Lord’s church, Paul wrote:
Likewise their wives must be reverent, not slanderers, temperate, faithful in all things. (1 Timothy 3:11)
Though this instruction appears in the midst of the qualifications for a deacon, surely it would be correct to understand that the wives of both elders and deacons should have these particular qualities. Does it make sense that a man’s ability to serve as a deacon (a servant tending to physical responsibilities in the church) is dependent upon his wife’s character, but that a man’s ability to serve as an elder (a servant tending to spiritual responsibilities in the church) is not?
As much as young men should seek to develop the characteristics outlined as qualifications for elders and deacons, all young women should likewise seek to match those defined for the wives of elders and deacons. Whether her husband ever becomes an elder or deacon does not matter. She must seek to be the best possible wife – suitable to aid her husband in qualifying to serve in a leadership capacity, if the local church so chooses.
Consider the qualifications of the wife of an elder or deacon:
- Reverent. She has a serious and respectful attitude towards the Lord and the things of God.
- Not slanderers. She has control of her tongue. She is not one who gossips about or criticizes others.
- Temperate. She is aware of the power of sin, and ready to overcome, and help others do so also.
- Faithful in all things. She is faithful in every duty which God has given her. She is a faithful Christian before the Lord, and faithful wife to her husband, and a faithful mother to her children.
Role Of The Older Couple
In writing to Titus, Paul instructed that the older men and women (which would included married couples) be examples to the younger. We read:
…that the older men be sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith, in love, in patience; the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things – that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed. (Titus 2:2-5)
Some have observed that if the young woman does not heed this instruction, she becomes a blasphemer of God’s word. As much s this is true, it is equally true that if the older men and older women are not the examples of faith which Paul writes about, they too have blasphemed the word of God. Truly, if any child of God is not what the Bible calls them to be, they blaspheme His word.
It has been stated above that all Christians should have the characteristics which qualify elders, deacons and their wives. Notice:
- Blameless (Philippians 2:14-16)
- Husband of one wife (Romans 7:1-4)
- Temperate (2 Peter 1:6)
- Sober-minded (1 Peter 5:8)
- Of good behavior (1 Timothy 2:9; Matthew 5:16)
- Hospitable (Romans 12:13)
- Able to teach (2 Timothy 2:2)
- Not given to wine (Ephesians 5:18)
- Not violent (Matthew 5:38-39)
- Not greedy for money (1 Timothy 6:9-10)
- Gentle (James 5:7-8)
- Not quarrelsome (Titus 3:2)
- Not covetous (1 Timothy 6:9-10)
- One who rules his own house well (Ephesians 6:1-4)
- Not a novice (Hebrews 5:12)
- A good testimony among those who are outside (Philippians 2:15)
- Not self-willed (Philippians 2:3)
- Not quick-tempered (Colossians 3:8)
- A lover of what is good (2 Timothy 3:3)
- Just (1 Timothy 5:21)
- Holy; Reverent (1 Peter 1:15-16)
- Self-controlled (2 Peter 1:6)
- Holding fast the faithful word (Ephesians 4:14)
- Not double-tongues (James 3:9-12)
- Holding the mystery of faith in a pure conscience (1 Timothy 1:9)
- Not slanderers (Titus 3:2)
- Faithful in all things (1 Corinthians 4:2)
(list modified from “ELDERS & DEACONS and their wives,” Frank Jamerson)
