Author : Keith Sharp
Most of our social and economic woes in the United States are rooted in a deeper, spiritual problem – divorce. For about a generation the divorce rate has been fairly steady in our country at around 50% (that means there is one divorce for every two marriages). The figure would be even worse were it not for the fact that approximately 2.2 million couples are living together outside wedlock. Thus, when separate, divorce statistics are not affected. The demise of the American family is at the root of virtually all our national problems.
What is true of the country is true of the Lord’s church in this nation. We are affected by the world. Divorce is a major problem among Christians. The Northside Church of Christ in Conway, Arkansas, where I preached from 1977 to 1984, split a few years ago because there were people in the congregation who had divorced for causes other than adultery. The preacher defended their right to do this as long as they remained unmarried.
Many people believe it is right to divorce for a cause other than adultery, as long as neither party remarries. Do the Scriptures support this? What does the New Testament teach about divorce?
Matthew 5:31-32
The first New Testament passage which regulates divorce is Matthew 5:32.
But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.
The Jews were interested in the legal procedure involved in putting away. Jesus was concerned with the spiritual problem.
Often Christians contemplating a divorce, in a situation that seems to them unbearable, claim, “I’ll live the single life.” Not only do the vast majority quickly decide being single is not what they want, there is another problem they selfishly do not contemplate. The mate that is put away does not have the right to remarry either. The one doing the divorcing is putting a stumbling block before his mate. If that mate remarries and thus lives in sin, the Lord holds the one who divorced her accountable also. “It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea” (Matthew 18:6-7).
Matthew 19:3-6
The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?’ And He answered and said to them, ‘Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning “made them male and female,” and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh”? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.’ (Matthew 19:3-6).
Please note that the Pharisees asked Jesus nothing about remarriage; they asked about divorce. In reply to their question, Jesus directed them to the origin of the marriage relationship. When a man and woman enter a scriptural marital union, God joins them. It is an affront to the divine majesty and the height of insolent rebellion to break apart that which God has joined. Thus, Jesus, the Son of God, specifically forbids divorce. He allows it only if one’s mate is guilty of “sexual immorality” (Matthew 19:9). One who divorces his mate for any other cause is rebelling against God and disobeying Christ.
1 Corinthians 7:5
Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control (1 Cor 7:5).
The context reveals the apostle is dealing with the right each marriage partner has to sexual fulfillment in the conjugal relationship. No married person has the right to refuse sexual fulfillment to his mate, unless it is by mutual consent, and that only temporarily, that they may devote themselves to fasting and prayer (spiritual reasons). This is to avoid causing one’s mate to be tempted to commit adultery.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11
Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: a wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife (1 Corinthians 7:10-11).
Paul forbids divorce on the part of both the husband and the wife. But, does he give a loop hole for divorce when he writes, “But even if she does depart”? No more so than John approved sin when he penned, “My little children, these things write I to you so that you may sin not. And if anyone sins…” (1 John 2:1). John does not allow sin. He tells what to do if you sin. Paul does not allow divorce for a cause other than fornication. He does not contradict the Lord. He tells a divorced person his options.
Drunken Husband
But what about a wife whose husband habitually comes home drunk and beats her and the kids? What about a penitent believer who dies on the way to the baptistry? Emotional circumstances do not change God’s law. Besides, we have police and laws against abuse. Christians are to fulfill obligations we have even to those who are unworthy (cf. 1 Peter 2:18-3:7).
Conclusion
Sometimes problems pile up on a couple until one or the other decides it is hopeless. One may look for scriptual justification for divorce, even though the mate is not guilty of fornication. There is none! Marriage is for life. Divorce is sin. Turn to God’s Word. Look to Him in prayer. Get help from godly Christians. You can make it!
